Can someone please help me write - in gaelic- a response. A couple of red neck Aussies try to insult an Irishman in their local pub by asking if he knows any Irish jokes he responds by speaking to them in Gaelic. The subtitles at this point would show something like.....pardon the colloquial swearing.....

You two are a right pair of stupid Antipodean bastards - not even clever enough to outsmart the English and you ask me if I know any Irish jokes - yeah but a couple of Aussie ones come to mind right now....

Help !!!!! It's words to that effect if anyone can think of a good response.......

Mary

Dia dhuit, a Mháire,
I'm not sure of my idiomatic forms, nor my grammar, but I couldn't resist at least trying.

Is péire fíor bastaird réamhcostha an dá dhaoibh!
Ní hé amháin cliste go leor ag bheith níos glic ná Breataine - 'gus tá daoibh a fhiafraí cé agam scéala gháire Ghealach!?
Bíonn! Ach, tá cúpla ceanna Astrálach ag theacht isteach i mo bharúil anois díreach!

I'm especially unsure about the word "réamhcostha". I took your word "anti-podean" as a slang form of 'prepodactical', which in itself is improper because of the adding of a Latin prefix to a word of Greek origin. But, that's another can of worms.
So, not knowing the actual word, I came up with "réamhcostha" - before footed.
Now, let's see what some of the better experienced might say to shed a little more light on the subject.
Slán,
Maidhc.

I went back to the dictionary and the English word should be "protopodalical".
That puts the two of them just one step over polliwogs on the evolutionary ladder.
My translaton into Gaeilge remains the same.
-Maidhc.

*Nach bastúin amaideacha Frithphóideacha an beirt agaibh? - níl an oiread sin céille agaibh an cluain a chur ar na Sasanaigh agus iarann sibh uaim scéalta grinne faoi na hÉireannaigh. Tá cúpla ceann Astrálach á cheapadh agam anois!*

I don't know what Antipodean is, I made up Frithphóideach. :-)

Let's see some more efforts and maybe we can patch something together that sounds natural.

Eidolon, you're going to ask for pronunciations as well, aren't you?

Antipodean means someone from the other side of the world (as Australia is, seen from Europe)

so "Frith" would not quite be correct

but a couple of Aussie ones come to mind right now....
ritheann cúpla ceann faoi Astráiligh liom anois..

Otherwise I Like Oliver's version. I'll try to crack the Antipodean nut later...

Help! After watching 'The gangs of new york' I am fascinated to know about the phrase that sounds like 'dead rabbits'.... anyone?